A devoted meditator, Eli Susman spent a month at a mindfulness practice center in southern France run by Buddhist monks focused on honing the art of mindful living.
Susman expected to spend most of the retreat in meditation sessions, but to his surprise, he found the schedule only allotted 30 minutes of formal meditation practice.
Used to much longer meditation sessions, Susman began to shift his mindset after later speaking with one of the monks. Instead of three hours of meditating, the monk advised him that three deep breaths were all it took to tune in to the present moment.
“This struck me,” Susman told CNN. “What if three breaths or about 20 seconds is really enough to make a difference in people’s lives?”
Susman, now a doctoral candidate in psychology at the University of California, Berkeley, tested his theory in a study published in April in the journal Behaviour Research and Therapy.
The study showed a single 20-second session of self-compassionate touch significantly reduced stress, increased kindness to the participant and improved mental well-being.
The effects on mental health were greater among people who performed this micropractice daily than those who did not practice as often.
“In this touch-deprived society, we can offer ourselves the same kindness and compassion we so freely give to others,” Susman said. “It’s right at our fingertips.”
How to Practice Self-Compassionate Touch
The benefit of self-compassionate touch is that it can be practiced anywhere, whether at home or on a crowded train, Susman said.
First, close your mind and think about a recent mistake or moment that made you feel unworthy or a failure. When these moments are remembered, notice any changes in your body.
Second, find a place to touch your body that is comfortable for you. Use any form of touch that feels comfortable to you. Doing so could include stroking the back of the neck, using the thumb to massage a spot on the palm, put a hand over your heart and one over your belly, or stroke the upper arms like a hug. Susman advised focusing on the sensation and warmth of the touch.
Third, people should ask themselves, “How can I be a friend to myself at this moment?” focusing on forgiving and accepting their imperfections. After 20 seconds, people can open their eyes or repeat the session as often as needed.
The study results showed the more people make self-compassionate touch a habit, the greater the mental health benefits. Susman suggested setting a cue, such as after brushing your teeth, as a reminder to perform the micropractice.