When Darrell Gails began working in Wichita Public Schools more than 20 years ago, he didn’t realize that his time spent in special education classrooms was divine preparation for a more personal assignment — his own daughter’s autism diagnosis.
“I didn’t go looking for those classrooms,” he says. “But looking back, I believe God was getting me ready for Carter.”
Carter is Gails’s third daughter of four. Carter was officially diagnosed with autism after early signs became apparent: delayed speech, minimal eye contact, repetitive behaviors like arm flapping, and not responding to her name until she was nearly 3 years old. She didn’t begin speaking until age 4 — but found ways to communicate in the meantime.
“She’d grab my hand and guide me to the fridge when she wanted milk,” he says. “That was her way of talking.”
This article is part of a series of articles we’ve run on Autism in the Black community. Check out these other stories:
An Explainer: On National Autism Day
The Need for Early Diagnosis With Autism and Why It’s Not Happening for Black Children
It’s Not an Epidemic — Black Autistic Students Need Support
Autism in the Black Community
Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is a developmental condition that affects communication, behavior, and how individuals interact with the world around them. While autism can affect anyone, the journey toward diagnosis and support looks very different for Black families.
Studies have shown that Black children are diagnosed with autism later than White children and are more likely to be misdiagnosed or overlooked altogether.
Some of this delay is due to systemic barriers — limited access to healthcare, fewer culturally competent professionals, and a lack of awareness in underserved communities. Stigma and fear also play a role.
“In our community, there’s this hesitation to talk about mental health or developmental issues,” Gails said. “We don’t always want to believe something might be ‘wrong.’ But the truth is, early intervention is key.”
Even as someone with years of experience working with children with special needs, Gails questioned himself when Carter was diagnosed.
“I remember thinking, ‘Did I do something wrong?’” he says. “But I know now — it’s not something to fix. It’s a different way of being.”
Strength, Support & Seeing Differently
As Carter grew, her uniqueness became more visible. She taught herself to read — in Russian — by watching YouTube videos. She developed an honest and deeply compassionate heart.
“She’s got a superpower,” Gails says. “She’s smart, she’s kind, and she sees the world through her own lens.”
The journey isn’t without fear — especially the fear many Black parents quietly carry.
“Will she be safe in a world that often misunderstands Black children?” he asks. “Will people mistake her silence or behaviors as defiance? Will they treat her with dignity?”
Those are questions many Black families raising children with autism wrestle with — balancing love and protection with the desire to give their child freedom.
One powerful moment was when Carter began saying “no.”
“She used to go along with anything. Now she sets boundaries,” Gails says. “That gives her a voice — and safety.”
Faith, Family & Forward Motion
Carter’s early diagnosis allowed her to receive services through Rainbows United and speech therapy at the Speech, Swallowing and Voice Center. She entered preschool at age 3 and was placed with peer models, not isolated.
“We didn’t want her separated from other kids,” Gails says. “We wanted her to grow with them — and they’ve grown from her too.”
Gails credits his faith and family for creating a supportive village.
“God comes first. And my family has embraced her from Day One. She’s never been ‘othered’ — she’s always been ours.”
Fatherhood, especially in the context of raising a child with autism, has transformed Gails.
“She’s taught me patience. She’s taught me to listen. Sometimes kids don’t need you to fix it — they need you to understand.”
His message to other Black parents is urgent and heartfelt:
“Don’t wait. Don’t dismiss it. Look up the signs. Ask questions. If it’s not autism, fine. But if it is, the earlier you act, the better. And remember — your child isn’t broken. They’re beautiful. Just like Carter.”
